My Top 5 Wishes for my Children

Confession time: I am something of a listaholic.  I have them everywhere, posted on the kitchen cupboard doors, on the computer, in my notepad, on the fridge, in the car.  Everywhere.  They are partly a bid to control things - money, shopping, housework; and partly a plan to improve things - our home, our diet, our free time, ourselves.  My lists mean I don't have to keep all that 'stuff' in my head, and for that I love them.

Last Saturday, another blogger posted on her top five wishes for her daughter.  If she could grant her five fairy godmother wishes, a la baby Aurora in the Sleeping Beauty story, what would they be?  After much thought, here are mine, for both of my beautiful daughters, and any future children too:

1. To never worry about your body

Be healthy, be strong, treat your body well, but never be concerned about its shape or size.  Your face is beautiful, your hair is perfect, your body is amazing.  Don't waste time worrying about perceived inadequacies, or comparing yourself to others.  Be incredible, beautiful, perfect you, always.  If that's not what others see, they have the problem, not you.

2. To only ever be involved with good men (or women)

Love comes from those who are content with themselves.  Not from those who want to damage you, physically or mentally, intentionally or otherwise.  People rarely change, don't listen to that.  If they treat you like a princess, all the time; if they recognise how wonderful you are, and tell you; if they think of you and put your needs high on their agenda; if you can be yourself, good and bad, in their company, all the time; if you feel completely comfortable with them, then maybe they are the one.  If not, run.

3. To have no regrets

The only things you should regret are the things you didn't do, and only rarely those.  So travel, dance, study, do whatever makes you happy at the time.  Be sensible, but enjoy your life.  Don't listen to those who hold you back, who show fear.  Think carefully, do what you think right at the time, and then don't look back.  The things you do will make you the person you become, so don't look back and regret them.  Learn, but never regret.

4. To value intelligence over beauty

And kindness, humour, courage, strength, honesty, compassion, thoughtfulness, reliability and so much more.  Yes, wear nice clothes, buy good skincare and make-up, take care of yourself and your appearance, but never set beauty above other qualities.  Unfortunately, our fame-obsessed society cares more about how someone looks than what they say or do, but I pray that you rise above that, that it doesn't affect you.  Your beauty, true unique beauty, cannot be measured against pop stars, reality show judges & contestants, models or whoever else.  Your beauty comes from your thoughts and actions, they matter far more.  Never forget that.

5. To recognise the true purpose of money

Money is a means to an end.  It enables you to have nice things, yes; to do the things you want, even more importantly.  But never desire it for its own sake, never worship it or pursue it.  The same for reputation and notoriety or fame.  Be yourself, do what you want to do, earn what you can to help you achieve your dreams.  Follow your dreams wherever they may take you, but please, never a borrower nor a lender be.  And never love, desire or hoard money purely for itself.

What wishes do you have for your child?

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  1. Sounds like you really put some thought into this one - lovely wishes - hope they get to read them one day. x

  2. This is a lovely list. You've chosen some important hopes for your girls' future!

    I wrote something similar a couple of weeks ago :)

    Best wishes xx

  3. Love these! We just wish our children have so much happiness! Great post, thank you for sharing.


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