How to Build Up Your Daughter's Self-Esteem and Confidence

Being a parent is a challenge, but especially if you have girls. Due to a combination of factors, girls are more likely than boys to suffer from low self-esteem and lack confidence. Read on for tips on how to build your daughter up so she has a healthy and positive future.


Research shows that girls are much more likely to develop eating disorders and they are more likely to self-harm when stressed or depressed. Also, girls think about and attempt suicide at twice the rate of boys of the same age.

Children of both genders can suffer from self-esteem and self-confidence issues, of course, but girls tend to have challenges in these areas more often. This is a result of cultural expectations, stereotypes and a culture which, unfortunately, often values appearance over substance.

While all children need high levels of self-esteem and confidence, many girls are especially at risk. Read on to find out how you can build your daughter’s self-esteem and confidence.


You can help your daughter have a happy and emotionally healthy life in these 8 ways:

1. Determine what she’s good at and help her develop that skill

Everyone feels good about themselves when they do something that they are good at. The better you are at it, the better you tend to feel. Having a skill or aptitude for something makes you feel special and capable.

As a parent, you already have a good idea of your daughter’s likes and strengths. From those items, identify something that your daughter loves to do and help her excel at it. Her confidence and self-esteem will soar.

2. Encourage her to exercise

Sign her up for team sports if that would appeal to her. Team sports have been shown to benefit girls by making them more confident. Team sports are a great way to learn new skills, make new friends, and build a social circle. Winning and learning how to handle defeat are both great for building self-esteem and confidence.

If she prefers more solitary sports, dance, ballet or even climbing or hiking, encourage those endeavours.

See: 8 Easy Ways to Keep Your Kids Active


3. Ensure that your daughter understands that your love isn’t conditional

Every child needs to understand without a doubt that they are loved regardless of their choices or success. Tell her and show her how wonderful she is and how much she means to you.

4. Let her have her own style

Allow your daughter to have her own unique style. This includes things like music, hair, and clothing. While her choices might not match your own, finding an identity can create emotional stability. This foundation can be a wonderful footing for her self-esteem and confidence.


5. Be a good example

Your daughter is always watching, even if she isn’t always listening and watching. If she sees her mother judging her own body in a negative way, this sends a negative message. Fathers can also say inappropriate things about women that have a negative effect on girls.

Consider how your behavior and comments could be interpreted by your daughter.

6. Praise effort as well as outcomes

It’s not possible to be successful all of the time, so focus on praising the effort she puts in. There are things your child simply won’t be good at, and both you and she need to accept that. It’s counterproductive to be critical when your child did the best she could.


7. Teach assertiveness

Confidence and self-esteem largely come from the ability to influence and direct your own life. Without assertiveness, your child is subject to the whims of everyone around her. Assertiveness teaches your daughter that her opinions and wishes are important.

8. Encourage your daughter to try new things

New things can be a little scary. Overcoming that apprehension is a good thing. It also allows your daughter to add new activities, skills, and people to her life - all of which will boost her self-esteem and confidence.


Daughters often need a little more help and attention than boys do but there are many things parents can do to help their daughter thrive into adulthood. Building self-esteem and confidence in your daughter is an important responsibility.

N.B. If you are having serious issues with your child, seek out professional assistance immediately.

More ideas for girl moms:




This post may contain affiliate links. If you click on one of these links and make a purchase, I may receive a commission for referring you. This in no way affects the price you pay. I only suggest resources and items I believe in and highly recommend. You can read my full disclosure statement on our Work with Me page.